Think about waking up every morning to someone telling you that you look terrible. You then head off to work and your boss sits you down to let you know you have no idea what you’re doing, you’re probably not qualified for this job, and that you suck at what you do. You meet with friends after work and in the middle of a conversation they stop to tell you that you’re extremely awkward, you don’t fit in and that you’re constantly making a fool out of yourself. It all sounds like one big nightmare, but it’s the reality of hating on yourself every day and it’s as exhausting as it seems. It’s a mindset that can cause low self-esteem, chronic fatigue, digestive issues, anxiety, depression– basically a myriad of health issues.
When we feel negatively towards ourselves we have a tendency to shut down. It’s within this reaction that we write our own self-fulfilling prophecies. By thinking you look terrible, you’re less likely to take care of yourself. By thinking you suck at your job, your performance could decrease significantly due to indifference. By thinking your friends hate you, you have a tendency to withdraw from them and in return they could withdraw from you as well. All of the outcomes are exactly what you expected, but they happened because of your mindset, not because of who you are as a person. It’s easy to get caught up in this cycle of thought, that is why conscious self-love is so important.
Think about how great you feel when someone gives you an uplifting compliment. You could give yourself that every single day if you held as much worth in your own opinion as you do other’s. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be the best for other people because we want to impress them with what we have to offer, but this way of thinking doesn’t guarantee a positive outcome. Quite the opposite, you’re actually setting yourself up for disappointment. We cannot control how other people view us, the only thing we can control is how we feel about ourselves. Not to sound cynical, but you are all you have. You are the only guarantee for yourself for the rest of your time here on Earth. Why not make this life experience a positive one by being your own best admirer? Seriously, you need to love the sh*t out of yourself starting now.
Wake up every morning and think of five things you love about yourself, write them down, say them out loud, scream them at your local cafe on your way to work, whatever. What do you love about your body? As Regina Spektor once said, “I got a perfect body cause my eyelashes catch my sweat.” That line gets me every time because we should only love something so simple and magnificent. Our bodies are spectacular and allow us to exist, every inch of us is magic. I don’t give a damn what magazines and social media say are ideal. We don’t need to cover up our cellulite, or conceal the bags under our eyes, or do those groundbreaking new workouts to get the body of our dreams– we need to love ourselves. It’s within loving ourselves that we take better care of our bodies because it feels good, not because we think we have to. What do you love about your mind? Find your talents and do them frequently. What about your soul? Find your passion in life and follow it. Love yourself enough to do the things that make you feel good.
You need to learn to love yourself for all that you are right now. Not when you reach your goal weight or get that promotion, right now. Every day you need to know that you are a positive part of this Earth and deserve to be here unapologetically. You are good enough now and self-love will only make you grow even better.